Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Decisions and Personal Revelation

Big kid decisions are hard. And they just keep piling up.

I am back in Rexburg and am so excited about it. Three months at home was plenty of time for me. Even though I was working 40 hours a week, it was in 12 hour shifts so I really only worked 3 days a week and had the rest of the time to just do nothing - which I loved before my mission but was a bit hard afterwards. So I am so excited to be back at school.

This is my last semester of classes which is bittersweet. I'm excited to be done but I don't really know what to do afterwards. That's not true. I got a lot of answers on my mission and I know where I need to go and what I need to do. I'm just not exactly sure why. And we all know that I like having all the answers.

New things are popping up that are making me doubt the answers that I've already gotten. After a long drive here and then a spur of the moment trip to Utah I had some health problems flare up on me (I'll spare you the details). I got a blessing from some mission friends and then another one from my Bishop and both told me that I had to make the decision about what and when I am going to do to recover from this. Both told me that it was going to be a long process. My mom has suggested a few times that I move back home and have the surgery and then come back out here in January. That is the last thing I want to do and luckily the Lord agrees. But that still leaves the problem of when to have it.

I am so grateful for personal revelation and the strengthened ability I received on my mission to recognize it. I am grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who is patient enough to give me the same answers over and over again just to reassure me that I am doing the right thing.